A love too pure can become poisoned by those with a love not pure enough.
I’m too submissive, too devoted. If I give myself to them then they will accept me and show me respect. But it hurts when they’re blind to the pain it causes me, and it hurts when I give too much. I am made of submission for those I desire love and loyalty from, so I become too loyal. I slip into a state where they can trample me; I crave the pain their footsteps cause me because I know they may in turn feel the guilt I feel for not giving them enough of myself - it’s messed up and horribly awful, like a knight willing to sacrifice his life for a corrupt king. Sometimes if ripping apart my emotions is what they choose, then I more than willingly accept it, for it is their request and they will love me for it … but then again, there are times when it strikes a raw nerve - I become angry and hostile, but then feel guilty, but then mad again, and so the cycle continues and I never know where the line is between selflessness and submission.